derek-duerden

Having seen and enjoyed "Werewolves on Wheels" many years ago (albeit during a Scala all-nighter, which may have reduced my critical faculties...) I was intrigued to see whether the same director bought some elan to this. Suffice to say I was hugely disappointed.

Apart from the (apparently legendary) "cat attack" sequence - and even that is very short - there's little here to lift it above the average exploitation fare of the time. And, indeed, the exploitative bits are all very short and surrounded by pretty tedious contextual shots, including lots of sugar-cane cutting scenes!

Not recommended at all...

If one were to be harshly critical of this, there are quite a few cliches in the plotting (the gay best friend, the bullying, the denial, the predators etc.) but I felt that it emerged from all of that to be quite sweet and having established real empathy for most of the characters.

Also, where these kinds of films often use adult actors to portray school-age characters in very adult situations and torpedo their credibility as a consquence - here the main crew pass for teenagers quite convincingly, I felt.

While the various plot threads came together in a somewhat-predictable manner, I was very much up for the feel-good outcomes presented.

Worth a look.

Given the title and some of the reviews, I was ready for this to be pretty awful - but also expected it to be fun.

Well... shame about the latter! (Mind you, I watched it stone-cold sober in the middle of the day - probably not the ideal conditions for this kind of thing!)

Fair warning to those thinking that the Quigley "shower scene" would make up for the rest of it - don't get your hopes up :) It's remarkably short and even quite discreet.

As for the rest, there's the "acting" and the special effects. The latter aren't too bad, if you focus on the 'zoids themselves - which look fairly effective, although the baby is silly. As for the giant fake beaver things - where did they come from?? They look totally inanimate and not unlike "Roland Rat" - if you are aware of his cultural significance. Where do they fit in the plot - who knows?

And then there's the acting - blimey. The only one who appears remotely competent is Ashlyn Gere - who is pretty much totally wasted here but handles her preposterous dialogue with aplomb. As for the guy who handles the last 10 minutes on his own - I'd already written him off dramatically - and being asked to look convincing while being attacked by a plastic doll is admittedly a hard ask - but if this was his finest hour then I certainly don't want to see anything else he's done.

Beware.