- Ralph Hinkley: Look at it this way, you're one step ahead of Lois Lane. She never found out who Clark Kent really was.
- Bill Maxwell: [meeting Tony for the first time] If you're looking for trouble, you've just come across the West Coast distributor.
- Ralph Hinkley: I'm not quitting my job. How am I supposed to eat? Go down to the welfare office and stand in the Superhero line?
- Bill Maxwell: If I'm not supposed to run this show, then why did our friends from the twilight zone put me aboard?
- Pam Davidson: Comic relief?
- Ralph Hinkley: Pam Davidson, my attorney, this is Bill Maxwell. We're in the superhero business together.
- Ralph Hinkley: [after confiscating a switchblade from Tony] Take any more of these things off you, I'm gonna have to open a shop in Tijuana.
- Ralph Hinkley: [having just learned from a dead man on the car radio that he will get a super suit] A suit? I don't need a suit, I got plenty of suits.
- Bill Maxwell: Well, what I got here, what you don't got, Mr. Hinkley, is a dead partner. If you will recall, somebody shot him full o' holes, which is a definite no-no in my book. That's the same one I mentioned a moment ago, the one I go by.
- [first lines]
- John Mackie: Hey, guys, come on please, man. All I wanna do is go back to my car, huh? Look, I don't want any trouble.
- Brother Michael: Jesus loves you, my friend.
- John Mackie: That's terrific news.
- Ralph Hinkley: We're going on a field trip.
- Cyler Johnson: A field trip?
- [laughs]
- Cyler Johnson: Man, we never go nowhere. Ain't nobody told you? See, this class gets loose in public, everybody's insurance premiums go up.
- John Mackie: Mr. Hinkley, it's up to you and Bill now. You've gotta do this. You've gotta take this on. You can change things. Save this planet from destruction.
- Bill Maxwell: Who shot ya? Who did that to you, John? Are you all right?
- John Mackie: I'm dead. Ain't that a laugh? Been dead for six hours. The ship picked me up out there afterwards. I'm leaving with them. It's a new life for me. Nice working with you, Bill.
- Ralph Hinkley: Tony, I'm not interested in Rhonda, believe me. I'm just trying to teach her, that's all. Maybe she needs some of that respect you're talking about. You ever think about that?
- Tony Villicana: Hey, man, she's just a girl, you know what I mean?
- Ralph Hinkley: Yeah, well, listen, she's got feelings just like you, and all you guys, you treat her like she's some kind of a pushover.
- Tony Villicana: She likes you.
- Ralph Hinkley: She likes me because I treat her with respect, that's all. Why don't you try that? Listen, send her some flowers. I gotta go.
- Tony Villicana: Flowers? Hey, I ain't no Cary Grant.
- Ralph Hinkley: That was my best earth shoes. Superman, he used to stash his clothes in the phone booth, and then he'd come back and he'd pick 'em up later. Try that today, get ripped off in 10 seconds. Boy, this is gonna cost me a fortune.
- Pam Davidson: I don't know about you two, but I am started to get very frightened. Now, why don't we just call one of your superiors and get some help.
- Bill Maxwell: Oh good, that's terrific, counselor. What are you gonna tell 'em? That we saw a spaceship, that it talked to us, Ralph has some long underwear and cape that makes him fly around in the sky? That's a straight shot to the rubber room, honey. You already seen that once.
- Pam Davidson: [after Ralph tells her about the suit] My parents are coming in next week from Michigan to meet you. Let's try the the little suit and the Lois Lane jokes on them. They're gonna love it!
- Bill Maxwell: [to Pam] You cannot step off a roller coaster, honey, just because it's going too fast.
- Ralph Hinkley: He's right. We're in this, we have to do something.
- Bill Maxwell: Whoa. Correct me if I'm wrong, but is this not our very first point of agreement, on anything?
- Ralph Hinkley: I believe it is, Bill.
- Bill Maxwell: Well, a ray of sunshine. Shall we dance?
- Ralph Hinkley: I mean I could kill the guy who designed this suit. Why couldn't it have... narrow lapels and a cutaway jacket? Why'd it have to be long johns and a cape?
- Pam Davidson: [to Ralph, who is wearing the suit and planning to break into a rich man's mansion] You go in there and you know what's gonna happen? You're gonna be sent away for so long, when you get out, this suit's gonna actually be in style.
- Pam Davidson: Are you saying this insanity has something to do with getting Taft in the Oval Office?
- Bill Maxwell: Well, we're just running it past the scanner, sweetheart, trying to find a little radio activity.
- Rhonda Blake: Do you like me, Mr. Hinkley?
- Ralph Hinkley: Of course I like you.
- Rhonda Blake: You think I'm cheap?
- Ralph Hinkley: [uncomfortable] Look, Rhonda.
- Rhonda Blake: My mother thinks I'm cheap, but then she's cheap, so how would she know.
- Rhonda Blake: You know, I'm getting real tired of being trash.
- Tony Villicana: Hey, come on, Rhonda, you ain't trash.
- Rhonda Blake: Oh, Tony, that's the way everybody treats me. Everybody except him.
- Ralph Hinkley: Listen, Bill, I hate to be a crick at this late date, but don't you think that plan is a little bit sketchy?
- Bill Maxwell: It's sketchy, it stinks. You got a better one, let's hear it.
- Pam Davidson: Somebody ought to keep the President from landing.
- Ralph Hinkley: She's got a good point there, Bill.
- Bill Maxwell: Well, it's got to be up to you. Buzz or something, anything.
- Ralph Hinkley: Buzz him? You mean, fly up at that helicopter?
- Bill Maxwell: Yeah.
- Ralph Hinkley: Listen, man, I am Captain Crash. I navigate like I was hit with a can of Raid. This suit belongs in the Smithsonian. How am I gonna buzz that chopper?
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What is the broadcast (satellite or terrestrial TV) release date of The Greatest American Hero (1981) in Australia?
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