- Kate Beckett: Hey there, Perlmutter.
- M.E. Sidney Perlmutter: Detective.
- [dismissively to Castle]
- M.E. Sidney Perlmutter: Writer.
- Richard Castle: [advising Alexis] Life is a journey. And there is no predicting the outcome. The only thing you can control are your choices. And they'll... they'll define who you are.
- Richard Castle: [learning the victim was being blackmailed] Beauty queens and naked pictures. As American as socialites and sex tapes.
- Captain Roy Montgomery: Beckett, you're a woman, right?
- Kate Beckett: Sir, I have no idea what to get your wife.
- Richard Castle: Still no luck on the gift?
- Captain Roy Montgomery: Keep coming up empty.
- Richard Castle: The best thing to give a woman is something she said she wanted when she didn't think you were listening.
- Captain Roy Montgomery: What if I wasn't listening?
- Richard Castle: Gift certificate?
- Kate Beckett: [accidentally interrupting Castle's conversation with Ashley re: Alexis] What was that about?
- Richard Castle: He wants me to advocate for him.
- Kate Beckett: Ohh. Well, that's sweet.
- Richard Castle: Yeah.
- Kate Beckett: And... awkward.
- Richard Castle: Mostly awkward.
- Kate Beckett: [entering the precinct to find Castle looking at Amber's blackmail photos with a magnifying glass] Remind me to get you a subscription to a girly magazine for Christmas.
- Richard Castle: Oh, that is so thoughtful, but I'm not looking at the naked girl.
- Kate Beckett: What are you looking at?
- Richard Castle: Everything but the naked girl. We were so focused on Amber, we almost missed the entire picture. What if Amber and Jeremy were killed not because of who was in this photo, but because of where the photo was taken? Anything look familiar?
- Kate Beckett: [he taps a corner of the photo] Sure does.
- Richard Castle: [whispering] You can thank me later.
- Kate Beckett: Okay, so let me get this straight. You don't remember where you were or what you were doing last night?
- Bobby Stark: [pause, trying to remember] That's bad, right?
- Richard Castle: Death of a beauty queen. Scandalous.
- Kate Beckett: Yeah. I'm surprised it doesn't happen more often.
- Richard Castle: Small-town girl comes to New York for the fairy tale, ends up with the horror story.
- Kate Beckett: Pageants aren't fairy tales. They're demanding, high-pressure competitions that bring out the very best and the very worst in people.
- Richard Castle: That is the voice of experience.
- [realizing]
- Richard Castle: Oh, my God! You were a beauty queen!
- Kate Beckett: No. I had a roommate, freshman year. Debbie Winokur. It was like living with Elle Woods on steroids.
- Kate Beckett: [the precinct is packed with pageant contestants] Castle, they're everywhere.
- Richard Castle: Smells like a perfume counter at a department store.
- Javier Esposito: [approaching] Beats the usual lowlifes and nutjobs.
- Kate Beckett: I don't know if you can say that nutjobs and beauty queens are mutually exclusive.
- Javier Esposito: Yo. Bobby Stark's blazer. Courtesy of the costume lady at the pageant.
- Kate Beckett: And the broken black sequin?
- Javier Esposito: Perfect match.
- Richard Castle: "Bam," said the costume lady.
- Kevin Ryan: [approaching] Ooh. She's not the only lady saying "bam" when it comes to Bobby Stark.
- Kate Beckett: Does he have a record?
- Kevin Ryan: Uh, no criminal charges, but Mr. Stark has quite the reputation.
- [holding up three folders]
- Kevin Ryan: Three women filed restraining orders against Bobby Stark in the last year. All for "unwanted advances."
- Richard Castle: How come I didn't hear about this on TMZ?
- Kate Beckett: Bad boyfriends and pageant queens? This is like Debbie Winokur all over again.
- Richard Castle: You having flashbacks?
- Kate Beckett: It was my own private Vietnam. Our place smelled of hairspray, perfume, and cigarettes. I'm surprised that we didn't spontaneously combust.
- Richard Castle: Is that America's dad, Bobby Stark? What's he doing here?
- Kate Beckett: He's the pageant host. Oh, please don't tell me that you watch his sitcom.
- Richard Castle: "Family Foibles"? Half of what I know about being a father, I learned from watching that show.
- Kate Beckett: What was your relationship with Amber Middleberry?
- Bobby Stark: Oh, come on! Are you serious? I didn't kill her. If anything, I was trying to recruit her.
- Kate Beckett: Recruit her? For what?
- Bobby Stark: For my, uh, goddess train.
- Richard Castle: The goddess train?
- Bobby Stark: Yeah, it's my own little private pageant.
- Kate Beckett: And how did Amber respond to this oh-so-enticing offer?
- Bobby Stark: You know what? She hadn't seen the light yet. She was coming around. I could always tell the innocent act when I see it. Besides, who wouldn't wanna ride the Bobby Rocket?
- Richard Castle: Everyone, from what we hear.
- Richard Castle: You know, I hate to interfere...
- Alexis Castle: Since when?
- Richard Castle: Point taken.
- [last lines]
- Richard Castle: Ashley. What are you doing here?
- Ashley: Hey, Mr. Castle.
- Alexis Castle: Hey, Dad, guess what?
- Alexis Castle: What?
- Alexis Castle: I'm going to Stanford!
- Richard Castle: [startled] What?
- Alexis Castle: I'm applying for early admission. And since I've been taking extra classes each semester since my freshman year, I have enough credits to graduate in the fall.
- Richard Castle: [in shock] What?
- Alexis Castle: Yeah. This way, Ash and I will be together in January. In college!
- Richard Castle: [in disbelief] What?
- Ashley: That was actually her idea, sir.
- Richard Castle: [long pause, in despair] What?
- [first lines]
- [during a dance rehearsal]
- Bobby Stark: [coming on stage] Huh?
- Felix: Okay, cue the chandelier.
- Richard Castle: Well, do what I do... Look at the odds as a challenge.
- Alexis Castle: Says the man who always loses in Vegas.