Woman Says She Won't Name Baby After Husband's Late Wife, Believes 'Our Daughter Deserves Her Own Identity'

"I don’t want to feel like I’m raising their child instead of our child," the mom writes in an anonymous Reddit forum

Man and woman are sitting at sofa and arguing
Man and woman are sitting at sofa and arguing in stock photo. Photo:

Photodjo/Getty

One woman is seeking advice after her husband asked if they could name their first child after his late wife.

In a post shared on an anonymous Reddit forum, the woman writes that her husband lost his wife, Sarah, five years ago.

"We’re now expecting a baby girl, and he insists on naming her Sarah," she adds in the post.

Frustrated couple with baby arguing at home
Frustrated couple with baby arguing at home in stock photo.

Getty

She told him that she "wasn't comfortable" with the idea, adding, "I don’t want to feel like I’m raising their child instead of our child."

"He blew up, saying I was being selfish and disrespecting Sarah’s memory," she continues. "I offered compromises—using Sarah as a middle name or picking something similar—but he refused, saying if I really loved him, I’d understand."

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Things got worse, she adds, when her husband told his family about the situation.

"His mother called me a 'jealous replacement,' and his sister said I should be 'grateful' to honor Sarah. Even my own mother thinks I should just give in. [My husband] barely speaks to me now, saying I’m ruining something important to him," she writes.

"I feel like our daughter deserves her own identity, but am I the a------ for standing my ground?" she adds in the post.

Fellow Reddit users are now chiming in, with one writing, "He's using emotional manipulation to try to get you to do something you're not comfortable with. He's putting his own feelings above yours. Not great signs for the father of your baby."

Added another Reddit commenter: "Tell him that he needs to decide if Sarah's memory is more important to him than his living wife's feelings about her own child."

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