Anime: Dragon Ball: Episode of Bardock

Dragonball franchise has taken the turn of Star Wars franchise: Both have one of the most succesful names on its genres, both spit out stuff to keep the fans on their toes and suck their moneys while they are at it, and both should stop making more and more crap and just let it die and enojy its legacy. OK, I don't think that another company will take the DB's copyrights and franchise, but it might as well, since it can save it!

Episode of Bardock is something that reminds me of a bad fan-ficiton. In fact I wouldn't be surprised if a Shounen Jump's employer's cousin or son wrote this as some fan-fiction, the employer stole and promised the kid some candy bars and took it to Shounen Jump and said "Let's make something out of it!". While there are some good fan-fictions, no lying to that, I dread to see the original fan-fiction.

This one has Bardock, the father of Goku, the one who stood his foot on Frieza and gave him the middle finger and died for that (and wiping an entire race of aliens in the process), somehow (it's not explained AT ALL!) travels back to the past and SURVIVES!!!! And from ALL places he goes, he is on the Vegeta planet a loooooong time back and fights Frieza's ancestor!!

*shrugs*

This is pretty much what happens when you try to milk a super-model thin cash cow that has no more milk and what spits out is white goo or snots or shit. It pretty much nullifies Bardock's big sacrifice and tragic tale that we all DB fans loved and still love (if they do the same thing with Future Gohan...... God help'em). It loses all gravity and proves that they can produce any kind of shit they want, as long as it has Dragonball on the name and we won't care at all. Well, my dear DB fans and fanboys, lean a bit here, a bit closer.... Don't worry I am not gonna rape.... Lend me your ears for a second and let me tell you this. Are you ready? OK, hear this....

*takes a deep breath*
WE SHOULDN'T TAKE THIS SHIT ANYMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am dead fucking serious!!! I am getting sick of this bullshit! It's getting worse with each time. GT sucks ass, accept that. And don't give me the "IT HAZ SSJ4 and SSJ4 GOGETA!! ITS THE BEST ANIEM EVAH!!1" bullshit, 'cause it was stupid to see yet another form of SSJ and let's not forget the villains that came out of their asses, Pan being a big annoyance, Gohan and rest being nerfed beyond repair and so many more. Every other movie after Broly sucks balls, Kai shouldn't even exist the way it is now (either do it 100% of what you promise or don't do it at all, you lazy assholes!) and now this. And let's not forget the various video games that pop out those recent years with ripping off our wallets each, hoping it's gonna be something different, whereas it's the same thing!

But, noooooooooo., you want to see SSJ Bardock and give it 10s for that right?! THAT'S ANOTHER BULLSHIT! It also nullifies the uniqueness of the "legendary" SSJ that was so good back then. It was also nice to see Vegeta getting SSJ, but after Gotens and Trunks.... it has stopped being unique and simply yet another generic shounen power-up (it IS a shounen power-up, but hey, I like it more than Bankais and crap). Fuck, if all the Saiyans could do it before Vegeta blew up their fucking planet, they would be done with it fast.

The ONLY good thing I love with this one I can honestly say without any sort of sarcasm are the animation, the art and quality of those two. THIS, PEOPLE IS WHAT WE SHOULD HAVE HAD WITH DRAGONBALL KAI!!!!! THIS!!!! Nice artwork, done with modern technology, NOT RE-USING THE OLD EPISODES AND CUTTING THEM AND CROPPING THEM TO MAKE SOMETHING OUT OF IT!! It's smooth, it's clean, it's fucking great! Oh right, I forgot about Kai: it's a market scam to see if people still remember Dragonball.

And after that, we get a new movie with the blessings of Akira Toriyama. That's like your mom coming to the kitchen and liking your roach-infested, filled-with-mold dinner and after eating it, she will get a nasty diarhea. We know the drill: everything will be fine and dandy, and suddenly a Bond-villain, more powerful than anything the Z Warriors have ever faced before, they will all fall down until Goku pulls a new, never-seen-or-heard-before-and-will-never-appear-and-be-mentioned-again special move to finish him. And people are excited about it.....

I stick with the original DBZ series and forget everything else (expect the 1st Broly movie, which is awesome. Broly is awesome! Be honest). Say anything you want about fillers and anything. I won't care. It has the most memorable and sympathetic shounen characters in anime. You all love them, you all remember them for their actions, their sacrifices, their comedic moments, their serious moments, their dramatic moments. I still remember being a kid and watching Sailor Moon, so I can see DBZ on TV and being excited about it. I didn't care about how long it would get to finish a mere battle. I knew I was gonna enjoy it. And I still do. Is it really that hard to make a series that has all that and still not succumb to the modern anime bullshit that appear, like school setting, moe girls doing stuff, teenagers with stupid problems and and stupid stories, so they can sell DVDs? I remember a time when I was watching animation on TV and liking what I was seeing. All I can do is cherish the good moments and memories of DB and DBZ (and Broly and Bardock) and just give the middle finger to all the new stuff.